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  • Writer's pictureSatire

New Year’s Resolutions: The Annual Tradition of Setting Ourselves Up for Failure

Don’t worry, some people do accomplish their resolutions 

By Kirstie Kinnaird

Image Credit: picjumbo_com via Pixabay

As the first day of the year dawns, streets line up with crowds watching the countdown, fireworks brighten up the night sky and the boat bells ring, we welcome a new year, a new year of beginnings, and new resolutions. However with it comes the overwhelming urge to cling to our old ways. We proudly declare that we will not change anything about ourselves this year. We will continue to procrastinate, indulge in unhealthy habits, and stubbornly resist personal development. After all, who needs growth when we can comfortably remain in our stagnant comfort zones? But many do decide to have New Year resolutions ranging from changing their hair, to travelling more. But let’s be honest, dear readers. How many of us stick to our New Year’s resolutions? We proudly proclaim that we never set foot in a gym, that we will continue to binge-watch our favourite TV shows, and that we will embrace our love for junk food. And yet, as the year progresses, we find ourselves yearning for change, for growth, and a healthier lifestyle. 


As the clock ticks to midnight on January 1st, gyms around the world rejoice in the influx of new members. Many people want to sign up for memberships to be more proactive. But alas, this surge in enthusiasm is short-lived. By mid-January, the once-crowded treadmills become ghost towns, as people realise that sweating profusely and waking up early is not as appealing as they initially thought, but also how expensive the memberships are these days, even with your student discount. Who needs abs when you can have a cosy sofa and a bag of crisps while watching your favourite movie or TV show? 


However, as students, we promise ourselves that this year, we will finally tackle that mountain of unfinished projects and show up to all our lectures, yes that sadly includes the 9 am ones. You may have said these exact words “I’m going to be productive this term and show up to all my lectures.” Yet, as the days turn into weeks, we find ourselves falling back into old habits of procrastination. Suddenly leaving assessments last minute and regretting it, binge-watching Netflix seems like a much more appealing use of our time than actually getting things done, and attendance in lectures slowly decreases giving you more of a choice of a seat, but who can blame us? who wakes up early just to show up to a 9 am lecture which will be recorded anyway. Oh well, “There’s always next year” right? 


Perhaps it's time we acknowledge the irony of this tradition. We rebel against self-improvement, only to find ourselves longing for it as the year goes on. We resist change as if it were some enemy when it is often the catalyst for personal growth and fulfilment. But no, we prefer to stubbornly hold to our old habits, as if they were precious relics of our identity. As we bid farewell to another year filled with broken promises and unfulfilled resolutions, let’s take a moment to appreciate the humour in our collective inability to stick to our grand plans. Perhaps the true lesson lies not in setting lofty goals, but in embracing our imperfections and finding joy in the journey, rather than fixating on the destination. So, here’s to another year of failed resolutions and the endless cycle of self-improvement. 



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