• The Gaudie

Kilau Theft

Scotland’s No. #1 Uni Subject to Least Competent Criminals.


by Gaudie Law Correspondent


Last night the Old Aberdeen café, Kilau, was the venue for a most wiley and ambitious heist. The Lidl brand Butch Cassidy snuck into the café and stole several purses from members of staff.


The individual then used one of the stolen bank cards to make a purchase in the Adie’s corner shop, Kittrybrwester area, Bedford Road, across from the Office Outlet, sort of near the McDonald’s, and Pure Gym, leading to him being clearly captured on CCTV almost imminently.


Police Scotland have been seen investigating in several areas of campus today and are in the process of locating the man in question.


Careless stoners have been advised to avoid Old Aberdeen for the next few hours.

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