How to Hallomeme
By Paul Friedrich
Photo courtesy of Ksyfffka07 on Pixabay
A not-so-wise soul once said: ‘Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.’ Sexism aside, there is one thing Mean Girls’ Cady Heron got right; every year, the last day of October grants us an amnesty from the social norms of couture-within bounds, for the trench coat exhibitionists among you.
While ‘sluttiness,’ in Cady’s terms, certainly is one way to enjoy this suspension of rules - more on that later, although the term ‘sexy’ might be more appropriate - another, and perhaps more audacious way to foment side-eye and whispers-behind-shielding-hands is to enter the realm of the bizarre. References to pop culture are always fun, especially when done with at least one co-conspirator. Linguini and Remy, Doofenshmirtz and Perry the Platypus, Fiona and Shrek, Sméagol and the Ring, Mort and King Julien, Vanessa Bloome and Barry B. Benson, the more cursed the better. Weaving in meme culture is another sure-fire way to provoke chuckles, and if you do feel at any point you’ve overstepped even Halloween’s boundaries of good taste, well, what you’re doing is ‘ironic’ and ‘camp’ and no one can say anything about that. If you’re oscillating between the makeup-maimed nurse and Big Chungus, go with the latter.
The last step to the perfect Halloween costume is the crossover factor. For extra potential and to avoid over-priced mail orders, put a twist on it. If memes and cursed content aren’t your cup of tea, go fashion. Assume the very unoriginal couples’ activity of going as Belle and the Beast; what if Belle was living her 1960s, convertible-down-the-California-coast Audrey Hepburn fantasy? As long as you keep the colour scheme and your accomplices’ costume looks ferocious enough, the sky is your limit.
Aberdeen’s surprisingly rife charity shop-scene is a gift from the heavens for this. In my experience, when it comes to flashy statement pieces to shock and dress up with, Stella’s Voice on King Street reigns supreme. For example, a leopard-print faux-fur jacket, a hair scarf, preferably blue, and a pair of cat-eyes, all of which I have found there, paired with anything yellow already in your closet will have you set for Belle meets Lana-del-Rey. If you have some time on your hands and don’t mind searching for the golden needle in the haystack, Sue Ryder and Shelter, among many others on George Street, will also serve you well. Going Charity over Costume Shop will save you money, and most of this clothing you can easily wear individually post-Halloween, making your costume sustainable, and, you, well….better than everyone, morally speaking.
For the finishing touch, return to Cady Heron, in her infinite, misled, but somewhat liberated wisdom: make it sexy, in the worst way possible. Going as Mario and Luigi? Wario and Waluigi are more cursed, especially sexy. Halloween is also about being scary. What could be more scary than Wario, moustache, red nose, hat and all, in thigh-high boots, fishnets, and a mini-skirt, mouth agape in a barbaric ‘WAA-A-A-A’?
