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  • Writer's pictureThe Gaudie

Brexit Means Breakfast

by anonymous

image via Wikimedia Commons


Brexit means breakfast

It's breakfast I want

No continental breakfast

No jam and croissant


Dry boxes of Alpen

Relaxed border control

Give me bacon, not Schengen

Give me moist egg rolls!


Feed me rounds of pudding,

Red, White and black,

I’m out of the union

I’ll never go back


I want slices of swine

And soft fried tomatoes

Tubes of trotter and snout

And tough trade embargos

Weak builder’s tea

For a weak nation state

And no trade negotiations

Until you clean up your plate


Greasy spoons in my mouth

Bloody knives in my back

Wedges of butter

And a swift heart attack


No compromises

No easy divorce

I want layers of hash brown

Swimming in sauce


Make the sauce mustard

Make the sauce brown

Make us all proud

Of our British towns


And our British workers

Will feast to their deaths

On slices of fried bread

Smothered in eggs


I like country life butter

I like strict immigration

I like PG Tips

I like super inflation


Brexit means breakfast

For Breakfast, lunch and tea

All day full British breakfast

In a post-breakfast economy

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